When our morals are challenged.

Today I am in a difficult position as I consider what to do with this moral dilemma:

A couple who stayed here at the inn about 5 weeks ago has now made reservations to stay with me again. The problem is this: During their last visit, I learned that girl is a student at the local Christian college. As a graduate and former employee of this institution, I know that she has signed a document which would condemn these arrangements with her boyfriend... Certainly it is possible that this is an "innocent" arrangement, but still the two students are putting themselves in a situation where it would be easy to compromise their own standards. So what do I do?

Can I reject this request for reservation? If so, what excuse do I use? Am I honest about it, saying that I cannot play part in what I know is a willful disobedience of standards that the student has promised to live by? Is is my legal right to do so, or am I inviting a discrimination lawsuit?

Do I notify the institution? I'll be honest, I feel very strongly against doing this. The right thing to do is to approach the student. I do wonder, if I only deny the student access to a room here, is that going to change her behavior? Would discipline bring spiritual growth, or cause spiritual questioning?

One thing I know for sure it this, I didn't say anything to indicate my disapproval of their arrangements when they were here the first time. If I had, perhaps I wouldn't be dealing with the situation again. Aren't we that way sometimes? We overlook a sin, or shortcoming, thinking it's a one time indiscretion. We are quick to sweep it under the rug, or say "well, just this once. It's OK." Fear of being "quick to judge" sometimes means that we overlook an opportunity to speak truth into another person's life. Overlooking sin (big or small) in our own life or others, opens the door for Satan to do even greater work. When we look the other way once, we're sure to be challenged with opportunities to do it again and again, risking the chance of behavior that could become out of control.

So what do we do?

I'm still thinking about this, so no answers today. Feel free to write me about your thoughts on the subject.

What's in a name?

When I was 30 years old, I changed my name. I've always been "Julie Marie"... I just haven't always been a "Jobryce". In fact, I made that name up. I'm the only one; I'm uniquely me. :)

People often ask me why I changed my name and I have a number of reasons that I won't go into here. Let's suffice it to say that I've always believed that your name said a lot about who you are... in more ways than one it is your identity. My last name, Jobryce, is reflective of my family - two brothers: Joe & Bruce. That's one of the many ways we are identified: family.

Today I was reminded of this again and the thought that came to mind is this: My identity is found in Christ alone. God says in Isaiah 43:1, "I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine."

Revelation 2:17 tells of a day in heaven when we will be given a "white stone with a new name written on it, known only to the one who receives it." I've always imagined that God has a special name for each of us... In my mind it's a bit like Pa calling Laura "Half Pint" in Little House on the Prairie. There are a lot of people named "Julie" in the world... but I have another name that is mine alone and only my Heavenly Father knows it. How exciting it will be to know that name... It is carved on a white stone just for me.

My Inheritance

This morning in church, our scripture passage was Psalm 47:

Clap your hands, all you nations;
    shout to God with cries of joy.

For the Lord Most High is awesome,
    the great King over all the earth.

He subdued nations under us,
    peoples under our feet.

He chose our inheritance for us,
    the pride of Jacob, whom he loved.

God has ascended amid shouts of joy,
    the Lord amid the sounding of trumpets.

Sing praises to God, sing praises;
    sing praises to our King, sing praises.

For God is the King of all the earth;
    sing to him a psalm of praise.

God reigns over the nations;
    God is seated on his holy throne.

The nobles of the nations assemble
    as the people of the God of Abraham,
for the kings of the earth belong to God;
    he is greatly exalted.

While our guest speaker made a number of great points, the thing that jumped out to me was his question, "Are you happy with the inheritance that God has chosen for you?" I have to say that being able to say a loud "yes!" to that question was an amazing thing for me.

I've spent a lot of my life wandering aimlessly, trying to figure out where I belonged in this world. It took a long time for me to reach the point where I could look at my life and say, "Wow. THIS is what God created me for... it's how He designed me and how He wants to use the experiences I've had in life."

Looking back on my life, I have discovered one important flaw in my wanderings... I was looking for where I belonged in this world; the fact is, I don't belong here. My home is in heaven, therefore, I am never going to find the answer to that question. The better question is this: "Father, while I'm here on earth, what is my assignment? How can I best serve You and honor your name?" While I am certain that there are many more answers to that question that I haven't yet discovered, I am thankful for a Heavenly Father who has chosen a good inheritance for me. He gives the greatest gifts and I'm blessed.

Brokenness, Joy & Sorrow

You have walked this journey with me for many years.
You have given me a place to call home when I was homeless.
You have encouraged me when I've faced disappointment.
You have cried with me when I will filled with sorrow.
You have applied a healing balm to my many hurts.
You have accepted me for who I am, even when I am "ugly".
You have been Jesus with skin on so many times....
You were my first real glimpse of Who He Is.

I have finally found a joyful place in my journey.
I have found a place to call home while in this world.
I have overcome disappointments and fulfilled dreams.
I have found the joy that overcomes my sorrows.
I have experienced healing in many broken places.
I have learned to be less "ugly" and be more kind.
I have come to know Jesus dwelling in me in new and powerful ways.
I have done all these things because you have been my advocate.

And, in the midst of all this joy I have found there is sorrow.
Sorrow that you are a prisoner in your own home.
Sorrow over your disappointments and shattered dreams.
Sorrow that it is beyond my ability to help you find joy.
Sorrow over the brokenness of your life that I cannot heal.
Sorrow that only the "ugliness" of this world is real to you.
Sorrow that when I want to be Jesus with skin on for you,
I cannot. A door that only He can open is in the way.

So I pray for a miracle. Wait for a sign.
And I promise God that I would give up
everything that I have gained
Just to know that you've found His Joy.

Mourning

Is it wrong that I cannot (will not)
mourn the death of my friend
who has entered into God's Holy rest?
Much more so, I mourn for those who
are still breathing earth's oxygen
yet they have no will to live.
I mourn those who are held
captive to their sorrows and
pains of their past.
How difficult it must be
to live days without hope or joy,
to trudge through life
feeling unlovely and unloved.
Yes, I will grieve, but not for
those alive in Christ.
I will grieve for those who are
yet alive and don't know it.

Sound verses silence

One of the terrific lessons I've learned from my friend, Virginia, is to slow down!  Putting it in musical terms, I'm trying to be more adagio  (A tempo having slow movement; restful at ease.) and less allegro (A direction to play lively and fast.) I like this from Eric Starr as he talks about the use of rest notes in music: 

As a composer, you'll want to think about “sound versus silence.” Finding just the right balance is essential. In the end, this means knowing how to use rests effectively. There is nothing worse than music that sounds “busy” or “cluttered.” If you try to create dense music, it will probably sound chaotic and muddy. Instead, strive to craft natural, flowing music using the fewest notes.

Throw the word "life" in that paragraph everywhere that you see the word "music" and read it again. The question is how are we composing our lives? Are we "using rest effectively" or are we "chaotic and muddy"? 

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” ~Matthew 11:23-30

Do not let your hearts be troubled...

So many things have been on my heart and mind that I thought I'd spill them out here so I can clear room for other things... so here's what I'm thinking about today:

Many of you know that my friend, Virginia, is in her final days on this earth. I consider Virginia to be a dear friend. God has taught me so much about Himself through my friendship with Virginia. At the same time, I also know that Virginia is ready to meet her Savior. She has lived a great life and had an amazing ministry. I am ready for her to hear Jesus say "well done, faithful servant, enter into my rest." When I visit her, I imagine that her mind and heart are with Jesus, but her body still lingers. I pray often for her to be set free from a broken body that holds her captive... freedom that will allow her to once again play the piano for God's glory and honor.

Just this morning, I was reflecting on my relationship with Virginia and asking myself why I continue to visit her daily, even though I am convinced that she doesn't really know that I'm there. I came up with these reasons:
1) I want Carol, who is Virginia's best friend, to know that she is not alone in her love and care for this precious woman. I want to speak words of encouragement and compassion to Carol and others who come to visit.... Caring for the caregiver, I guess.
2) God keeps teaching me something new about Him when I visit Virginia. I sit and read scripture and it's amazing how differently I see it when I consider His Word in the presence of one who is about to leave this world and enter His presence! It was encouraging this past week when I read a devotional on John 14:1-3 - "“Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God^, believe also in me.  My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am." --- It was noted that JESUS HIMSELF will come to take us to where He is..... He's not sending an angel to do it. He's making the trip to get each of us Himself. I love that... I imagine Jesus coming to get Virginia and take her home to the place He has prepared especially for her.. no doubt, it has the grandest of grand pianos. :)
3) Virginia's ministry still continues and I love to hear the stories. CNA's who cared for her at Wesley Village are coming to visit because she has made a difference in their lives. A CNA from the floor where she spent her first 5 days at St. Joe's after her stroke has come to the hospice floor to visit. In those 5 short days, Virginia developed a relationship with that young lady. She came to tell Miss Virginia that she and her husband had started going to church together again..... God is allowing me the privilege of seeing just a few bites of the fruit of Virginia's labors for Him.

Certainly, my heart has been heavy in recent days, but Virginia's pending home-going in not a source of sorrow, but of joy. My greater sorrows are for my young friends who may be in grave danger... and for my best friend, who has isolated herself from those who love her most... and I fear may have a clouded view of who she is in God's eyes.

Sorrow struck me yesterday when I saw a video that ridiculed "stupid criminals" who were the butt of a media joke because they got stuck in the mud making their getaway. One of the two young men wept openly at his situation as he realized that this newest strike on his record was sending him down a path he didn't want to travel... and I wept too because I wanted to know where the people were who should have been helping him to know that there were better choices available for him... that he, too, has a Savior who has redeemed his life, but  is anyone telling this young man that truth? Sorrow struck me as I watch a few moments (that's all I could take) of a show on TV that featured homes that were outrageously extravagant.... a bathroom where just the tiles cost over $100,000 dollars... I had to walk away and weep because I couldn't imagine how God must feel when His children are homeless, helpless and hungry in the midst of all this.

If I were a superhero, my super human strength this week would be "hyper sensitivity" ... I read news stories and witness things myself that are devastating. And all I know how to do is cry and pray. And I want to do more than that... I want to be an answer to the prayers I lift. I want to do a better job of being sensitive to God's voice when He invites me into the things He's doing. I want to stop and share words of comfort with the man in the hallway at the hospital who is clearly distraught over the condition of his loved one... instead of looking away so as not to embarrass him in the midst of his own sorrows. I want to do more, not because it earns me a merit badge, but because it's what will bring honor to my Father in Heaven.

So that, in a rather large nutshell, is what is on my heart today. How about you? Can I help to carry your burden to the throne of Jesus?

Out of the box... into the circle.

Today was one of those days that I decided to work on cleaning up my apartment. It tends to be the "catch all" for anything I need to get out of the public areas of the Inn and quickly becomes cluttered... As I often do, I found myself throwing all kinds of miscellaneous things into a box to be sorted out later. (Actually, I have several boxes for sorting.) The only thing that the objects in these boxes have in common is the fact that I don't know what to do with them. There's no obvious home for these things in my apartment, so I've bundled them up and will eventually unpack them and try to them fit in, or throw them away, or pass them on to Goodwill... one day, I'll deal with these things as seems fit.

Sometimes I think this is the way the Church deals with people. We don't know what to do with them so we put them in a box and hope that eventually we or they will figure it out. There are many people who I believe get the box treatment; people I think of as being "on the fringe" when it comes to the circle of fellowship in the Church. I'll speak to the issue from my own personal experience as a single person in the "married Church". 

I am convinced that the married Church doesn't know what to do with single people, so they lump them all together and call it "Singles Ministry." In general, the only thing that really ties everyone in the group together is their marital status. Very little consideration is given to the details of individual lives that make up this group. They are single. Shouldn't that automatically qualify them to be in the same box together? 

Here are just a few of the many details that work together to make up the group of people the church likes to call "single" - We have never been married, or are divorced, or are widowed, or are separated. We are in our 20's, 30's, 40's, 50's, 60's, 70's, 80's, and 90's. We have never had children or are single parents or are "empty-nesters." We are gainfully employed or are unemployed or are retired or are on disability. We hope to marry (or remarry) someday or we have no interest in getting married (or remarried) or we just plain hope for God's best whatever that may be. Our family lives nearby, or far away, or we have no family at all. We are content with the life we live or we are disillusioned because we had hoped for something more. We are unique. 

The fact is, as a single person, I don't want to be lumped into a box with other single people. I want to be able to get out of the box that the Church has designed for me and get into the circle of fellowship. The church is full of circles of fellowship and it is generally well understood who belongs in those circles. My challenge to the Church would be to widen it's circles by learning to be inclusive, rather than exclusive, in its approach to ministry. My challenge to myself is to learn how to be an educator and advocate for people like me who often feel like we're on the fringe. My challenge to anyone who feels like they are on the fringe is to take action; be bold to find your place, rather than fretting because you haven't received a personal invitation. 

As I mentioned earlier, there are many people who may feel like they are "on the fringe" for one reason or another. They don't have a sense of belonging. They can't figure out where they fit in and the Church is ill-equipped to help them figure it out. Do you have a circle? Can you stretch that circle wider to help another in the body to find his or her place? Who do you know that might feel like he or she is on the fringe? An important note: fringe people are NOT mission fields. They are people who want to know that they matter in the Kingdom of God. They are people who want to know that they are of value to the body of believers. They are people who want to be shown that they do, indeed, have a place where they fit into the Church.

^"Is not the cup of thanksgiving for which we give thanks a participation in the blood of Christ? And is not the bread that we break a participation in the body of Christ? Because there is one loaf, we, who are many, are one body, for we all share the one loaf." ~1 Corinthians 10:16-17

^"Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink. Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many." ~ 1 Corinthians 12:12-14

Will you be voting this November?

Recently a friend on facebook raised a question that I've also contemplated: If you don't fully support the platforms of either candidate, should you vote? Based on replies to this question, as well as some feedback unrelated to this facebook dialog, I've come to the following conclusions:

• Our right to vote is a gift from God. He has used our government system to give us that right.  "Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God." ~Romans 13:1
•  NOTE: Don't be tempted to leave the decision "in God's hands"... He moves through His people.  "faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead." ~James 2:17
• Our freedoms as U.S. Citizens (including the freedom to choose our leaders) been defended by men and women in the military for years. We disrespect the sacrifice of many when we do not use our freedoms. Voting is one way that every citizen has "freedom of speech" and we need to let our voices be heard. 
• Voting for the "lesser of two evils" is still an important action. When we fail to do even this, we have increased the likelihood of the "greater of two evils" being in power. We whittle away a little of the evil and press on with prayer, in hopes that God will be merciful to our sin-filled nation. 

 So, even though I'm having a hard time being fully supportive of candidates in most of the positions up for election this year. I will pray for and research the candidates. Then on November 6, 2012 I will get out and vote with my best possible conscience. I hope you'll join me at the polls.

The Journey from Restless to Rested (Ps 107:4-9)

"Some wandered in desert wastelands finding no way to a city where they could settle" v4

To say I've moved a lot would be an understatement. At one time I could say "in 27 years I've moved 27 times." I wandered from place to place, town to town, state to state. I changed jobs, schools and, even friends, like I was changing my clothes. And like my clothes, I could never find the right fit. It didn't fit my personality, my preference, my style... When something didn't suit me, I tossed it aside, donated it to goodwill, and moved on... "Surely the next shop will have something more to my liking," I thought.

"They were hungry and thirsty and their lives ebbed away" v5

Oh, yes. I was hungry and thirsty... but not for physical food. Certainly I've had more than my share of that. My hunger went deeper than any physical nourishment. I needed something else. Still I fed my hunger with that which cannot satisfy. I drank stagnant water from a rusty cup and pretended that it quenched my thirst.

In the midst of all this, I somehow knew that "the Lord, He is good and His love endures forever." (Ps 107:1)

"Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble and He delivered them from their distress." v6

I hit a lot of walls as I journeyed through the maze of my life. At every turn, my Heavenly Father was waiting for me to ask for His help. Each time I asked, He answered. The key became this: Keep on asking!

"He led them by a straightway to a city where they could settle." v7

When I finally reached the point of surrender, I listened to the guiding voice of my Savior and He led me to a place I can now call home. I'm always mindful of the fact that this is not my home [ah, someday - heaven!] but for now, I am in a place that is as much like home as it can be.

"Let them give thanks to the Lord for His unfailing love and His wonderful deeds for men, for He satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things." v8-9

Although it has taken me a long time to surrender to the Father's love, I'm so blessed to have done so. Nothing can satisfy me like Jesus! He is daily pouring out His unfailing love upon me. He has satisfied my thirst with Springs of Living Water and filled my hungry heart with blessing upon blessing. Praise His name!

Life is far from perfect, but it sure is a lot closer when I "give thanks to the Lord, for He is good and His love endures for ever." 

Encourage one another

May I introduce my sweet friend, Virginia? I've known her name for a long time, but have gotten to know her over the past year. We meet together weekly for fellowship, reading and prayer.

I cannot begin to tell you the ways that she has blessed me with her words of encouragement and her prayers. I have learned to pray more meaningful prayers because she models it for me. Her heart is so full of love for Jesus!

One of the consequences of being single is that you don't have anyone to say "how was your day, Dear?" Virginia fills that gap for me. Every week she is eager to hear about my week past and the week ahead. Often she challenges me in regards to my physical care of myself. (It's nice to have someone who will do that.) She encourages me in my work and reminds me that I should learn to ask for help when I am clearly too busy.

Together we area able to share our joy and sorrows, laughter and tears. There is great joy in seeing a smile on the face of this precious woman of God. 

I thank God for bringing us together during this season of our lives. In His great wisdom, He knew that we would be good for each other.

"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up..."

~1 Thessalonians 5:11

A leap of joy

I love this picture! How wonderful to leap into the strong arms of the one you love and know that he loves you, too. To know that you are in the arms of one who will always love you, always protect you, always provide for you.

I look at this picture and think how wonderful it will be to leap into the arms of my Savior someday. Know that He has been my everything and that I can express my great joy in this way.

Striving for perfection...

I've been reading and reflecting on Jesus' Sermon on the Mount. This morning's reading included this passage from Matthew 5:43-48:

 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.  If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect. 

There are a number of scriptures where we are admonished to be perfect; my question became "what does this passage teach me about the perfection of Our Father and how I should be perfect?" After re-reading the passage and giving it some thought, here is my conclusion:

Jesus is talking about loving people, even it they don't love you back. Our Father in heaven sends sunshine and rain on everyone one, regardless of whether people acknowledge Him as the source and thank Him for the gift. In fact, he does so even when people are evil and persecute Him! He shows no partiality when it comes to love. Even when they strike out at him and crucify Him, Jesus cries out from the cross: "forgive them for they know not what they do."  Jesus is our model of perfect love.

So I strive for perfection when it comes to love. In my own strength, this is an impossible task... but with God, all things are possible. 

Come Holy Spirit and love through me in ways that I cannot love on my own. Help me to love those who have hurt or disappointed me. Help me love those who cannot or will not love me back. Help me to love as you love. Help me to be perfect.

Be reconciled

“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift." ~Matthew 5:23-24

 I'll confess that I've always read this passage and thought about people who have wronged me... But it says if someone "has something against you" -- It's not if I have something against my brother... as a believer, I am to forgive... what I believe is being addressed here is if I have in someway offended or hurt someone else. 

Today I'm headed to my HS Reunion, as well as visiting with some family. My prayer is this:

Lord, please bring to mind anything I need to apologize for and help me to reconcile the relationship... and, as you work in and through me, to reconcile others to yourself.

My Public Defender

Today I was thinking about the Public Defender who has been assigned to the Colorado Theater Massacre suspect. How difficult it must be to be required to defend someone who is without a doubt guilty of some crime!

As I thought about this, the thought came to mind: This is who Jesus is for us. He is our Public Defender speaking on our behalf and when we have been declared "guilty", still we are set free because He has already paid the price.

Thanks be to God!

Giving in each season of life

On Mondays I meet with an elderly friend. We usually read a book together, but most importantly we share fellowship and pray for one another. I look forward to my weekly visits where I find encouragement and often am challenged to think more deeply about matters of faith.

My friend is a retired missionary and accomplished pianist. She has traveled the world sharing her gift of music. Now, playing the piano is a challenge and often she struggles to call to mind things that she taught for over 50 years. For example, today she commented that I was speaking "allegro" (a musical term for "fast.") I asked her the word for "slow" and it took her longer than she thought it should to finally remember "adagio". It is moments like this that my friend says "I have nothing more to give." She feels useless as she sees the gift she's shared for so many years fading away.

 It is not unusual for people to begin to feel this way as they age, but this feeling is not unique to the elderly. We all have gifts that God has given us and talents that we've gained through training and hard work. These gifts and talents can become our identity and our foundation can be shaken when something hinders us from giving in the way we have in the past.

I remind my friend that we all go through seasons in life where the way we give needs to take on a new form. It is important that we focus on how God would choose to work through us today, rather than mourning over the fact that we can't give in the way we did yesterday. As long as we are on this earth, we can trust that God has a perfect plan for how He would like to work in and through us to bring honor to His Name and to draw others unto Himself.

We must remember that our identity is in who we are not what we do. We are God's children and, as such, we are of great value to Him. In each and every season of our lives, He has a plan and a purpose for us. We must learn to listen to the Holy Spirit's leading as He reveals the new way we can give of ourselves for His service today.

Many are the plans in a person’s heart,
    but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.

 ~ Proverbs 19:21

The purist of motives

There is a blog called "Single Dad Laughing" that I sometimes read. Spiritually, Dan identifies himself as an agnostic [he was raised in the Mormon Church]. There are times, like today, when I read his blog and pray that he will make a connection between his experiences and the Amazing God that I know.

Today's SDL blog challenged me to think about my faith and how it is represented in the world. I'm going to share a few paragraphs and you can read the entire blog here. Just to give you a little background, Dan recently went hiking with some friends and ended up in a crisis that required a Search and Rescue Team to come to his aid [His 5 part blog about his experience can also be found in his blog page... in this particular blog he is sharing his decision to begin training to become a Search and Rescue Team member.]

 Here are Dan's thoughts as the response team comes to his aid:

"...never did any of them ask how I got into that situation. They only asked themselves how they were going to get me out. They worked as a team and a brotherhood to get me the immediate medical care I needed, and nobody complained about any task they were given, no matter how big or how small. Nobody complained of the timing. Nobody complained of lost wages or time. Nobody complained about my inexperience or my stupidity.

As humans, I think we tend to look at others who are in trouble (whatever the trouble may be) and base our willingness to help on our own judgments of what got them into that situation. If the path that led them to where they are was one of stupidity, laziness, lack of education, or addiction, we often refuse our services.

I don’t know what I was expecting at the top of that mountain. I think I was expecting to have to explain myself and why my situation really did warrant help. I think I was expecting to have to explain how none of it was really my fault and how I was the victim of unknown forces. I think I was expecting to deal with Search and Rescue the same way people deal with others every single day… Fearful of judgmental response.

What I got instead was a glimpse at real love for one’s fellow man. It has been a long time since I’ve seen such a cooperative effort done from the purist of motives."

As I read this, I couldn't help but wonder... Has Dan, who is representative of a number of people, rejected Christ because those who claim to serve Him are doing so with a "judgmental response"? Did one too many people proclaim Jesus' name and then spout forth their own personal criteria to determine whether the individual's situation warranted help?

There are many people in the world today who are waiting for help from a Search and Rescue Team. Jesus came to seek and save the lost (Luke 19:10)... He wants us to help him with this mission. People are hurt, lost, thirsty... and we Christians are equipped to come to their aid. The question is, are we willing? and will we come to another person's aid with pure motives and without judgement? It may be that a life is depending upon it.

Special Names

I love nicknames! Do you have any special names that only certain people use? I do and I love it! There's just something about hearing a dear friend or family member call you by a name that you know they chose just for you.

In Revelation 2:17, it says that God will give us a "white stone with a new name written on it, known only to the one who receives it." I've always imagined that was a special name... the nickname that Our Heavenly Father uses for us when He talks with the Son and the Holy Spirit about us. I don't think that it is a change from "Julie" to "Sarah" or "Elizabeth"... I think it's that special name that only My Father uses.... I imagine it's like Little House on the Prairie where  Pa always calls Laura "Half-Pint".

I like that... can't wait to see what my new name will be! How wonderful it will be to hear it from My Father's lips when I see Him face to face. Joy!

Church: a human institution with a divine commission.

I've recently had conversations with a few different people about the value of attending Church. I know many who have deep faith, but no interest in "religion" (i.e. the church as an institution). Today I received this devotional thought from the pastor of Bowling Green 1st Christian Church (where my parents attend).

In a pointed editorial in Saturday's New York Times, Maureen Dowd... posed a question...  It is a question churches of every hue need to contemplate.  "How do you take spiritual direction from a church that seems to be losing its soul?"

I fear one of the reasons more and more people have opted out of church life rises from a feeling that the church doesn't have relevant answers for today's world.  Young adults have witnessed scandal after scandal that have rocked both Protestant and Catholic Churches.  They've seen churches fight and feud over things like the kind of music to be used in worship.   They've seen people turned away from the church because of their skin color, their sexual orientation, or their poverty.  They've seen television ministes get wealthy and committed small church pastors struggle for survival.  They've heard liberal Churches demonized and conservative churches minimized.  They've seen parents put on saintly faces on Sunday morning only to live like the devil the rest of the week.  "How do you take spiritual direction from a church that seems to be losing its soul?"

While those of us in the institutional church wring our hands and worry about what is to become of the church, it might be good to remember a young man who lived years ago who felt the religious structure of his day had disappointed.  "It is written, 'My house shall be called a house of prayer'; but you are making it a den of robbers," (Matt. 21:13).  This young man wasn't anti-God.  Indeed he had come from God with a message of hope and grace.  He would die on a Roman cross for his new ideas and God would honor this young man by raising him from the dead. 

I pray those who feel the church is losing its soul won't give up on their quest for God.  And I pray they will recognize the church is capable of reformation and change.  It is a human institution with a divine commission.  When it works, it works better than any other human organization.  When it is filled with those committed to be the faithful hands and feet of Christ, nothing on earth can stop it.  If this is not the case today, may a new generation make it so.

Prayer: Lord, you give us the church as your body in the world.  We confess its flaws and weakness.  We pray for new strength and power to transform that which is corrupt into that which gives glory to you and bears witness to the life of Jesus.  Renew us, we pray, in the name of our brother Jesus. Amen

I ask myself: am I a stumbling block or a stepping stone to others who would seek Christ?

Critical of my brothers and sisters

Hmmm.... seems like today is another day that my blog will be a confession. I'm reflecting on yet another stumbling block in my walk with Christ and I'm seeking to move beyond another bad habit. The fact is, I have an overly critical heart when it comes to my brothers and sisters in Christ. Let me give you a few examples so you'll see what I mean:

Example 1: There is a woman I know who always seems to rub me the wrong way. Anytime someone has a problem to tackle she is always quick to quote a scripture or have a "pat answer". In my own spirit I feel her words are harsh and critical nearly saying "if you were just perfect in your faith like me, you would know that [this Bible truth, that resource] is the answer to all your problems." Now I know the Lord has used her to reach many people and impact their lives. She has a heart for the lost and loves them deeply. Plain and simple the problem is that she doesn't do things the way I would do them. [insert tongue in cheek here] She is bold and crisp with her approach; I tend to be slow and test the waters. I often challenge myself to ask why I allow her style to annoy me. Perhaps, if I'm honest, it's partly because she has a boldness that I don't have. There are ways I wish I were more like her... and ways I'm glad I'm not. The fact is that both of us are uniquely designed by God to serve His good purpose to glorify His name and bring others into His kingdom. There are people that she can reach that I never will... and vice versa.

Example 2: I have friends who I love dearly and who sometimes frustrate me to no end! They love the Lord and teach their children to walk in His ways. They have family members who do not walk with God and who live lifestyles which my friends do not approve. They are openly critical of their family members, sometimes showing great disgust for their lives. Deep under their disgust are genuine hearts for their loved ones; they want them to know Jesus and to walk in His ways, choosing right for themselves and their children. I wonder if their critical hearts have become more visible than their loving, compassionate hearts? Would they reach their family better by another way? Again, I realize that their way is not my way, but that doesn't make it wrong. I think I'm too quick to "excuse" the bad behavior of those who "know no better". I don't speak up; I don't make people aware of their sin for fear of offending them.

The bottom line for me is this: I need to stop focusing on how my brothers and sisters in Christ are "doing it wrong" and start focusing on how I can be obedient to what God is asking of me; I need to keep my eyes on Jesus and the path He is leading me down, instead of being critical of others. Certainly, if I see a brother or sister who I genuinely believe is in error, I should confront them privately [as opposed to harboring negative feelings in my heart]. Good dialog among believers can heal a multitude of hurts and alleviate a lot of misunderstandings.

More and more each day I find myself wanting to be more like Jesus. This means I must rid myself of the things that hinder my walk with Him. If it doesn't not honor God and edify His Children [my brothers and sisters] I need to purge it from my mind.

I am praying that God will "fill you [and me] with the knowledge of His will... so that we may live lives worthy of the Lord and please Him in every way." Read Colossians 1:9-14 A great prayer!

Putting Words In God's Mouth

I have a friend who often uses the phrase "the Lord told me to..." or "the Lord told me not to..." or "the "Lord told me [this or that] will happen." Often times at I hear these words I sense in my own spirit that the word she received isn't what God would speak to her at all.

Do I believe that God speaks to us? Absolutely! I have my own testimony of dreams that I believe were given to me as a word from the Lord. However, I am also trying to learn to be very careful about putting words in God's mouth.

This morning, I read Jeremiah 23:36. God says, "You must not mention 'the oracle of the Lord' again, because every man's own word becomes his oracle so you distort the words of the Living God." The warning here is against false prophets. John also addressed false prophets when he said, "Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world." (1 John 4:1)

We can be false prophets ourselves. Whether we say "the Lord told me" to ourselves or someone else, we must be careful not to put words in God's mouth! It is easy to want God to be "on our side" about an issue, especially when we really want (or don't want) something. Most of us would confess that we've presented an issue with God on our side at some time in our lives. However, as mature Christians, we must learn to test that word by studying what God says about the matter in scripture and listening to the wise counsel of friends, family, and church leaders.

God most definitely wants to speak to each of us and He desires that we hear His voice. Let's be intentional about seeking out His Word in scripture and through Godly Counsel before we put words into His Mouth!

May His Voice ring clearly in your ears today.

Have you had your 8 glasses today?

Dehydration. I live in a perpetual state of dehydration because I have not made it a habit to drink the "eight glasses of water a day" that is prescribed by health professionals. There are days that I can look back and realize that I've not even managed 2 glasses, let alone 8! (Many experts actually recommend more, depending on your body type, age, etc)

So what?
There are all kinds of implication of not getting enough water. Hypertension and poor blood circulation are just two areas impacted by a lack of sufficient water. I suffer from both. A few months ago, I attempted to give blood but was turned away. Why? They couldn't find my blood vessels because I was so dehydrated! Not only was my unhealthy habit damaging to myself, but it also hindered my ability to help others.

Learning to drink more water is a difficult discipline for me to develop. It just isn't in the forefront of my mind and I often overlook my body's "thirst indicator." Did you know that we often time mistake our bodies thirst signal for hunger and eat when we really just need a drink of water? Yep. It's true.... and this feeds right into another difficult discipline for me: eating right.

This week I read this passage from Jeremiah: “My people have committed two sins: They have forsaken me, the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water." Obviously there are some spiritual implications here; however, I believe there are physical implications as well. My body is designed to need water, yet I have forsaken the habit of drinking water as needed. AND I have substituted unhealthy alternatives in place of water: drinking beverages that are filled with sugar, caffeine, etc and eating when my body really just wants a drink of water OR simply not drinking anything at all (empty cisterns).

Plain and simple: I need to have good old fashioned water in my diet because that is the best thing I can do for my physical body. It hydrates me, keeps my blood flowing (which gives me more energy), cleans out my system and in the end, it contributes to losing weight. Nothing but good can come from adding water to my daily regimen. I like that!

If you're ever in the neighborhood drop by for a cup of cold water. Cheers!


Blessings,
Julie

Is there anything else.....?

"Is there anything I can get for you that I haven't offered you yet?"

This question has become a part of my daily routine when serving breakfast to guests at The Potter's Inn. It is a joy to "go the extra mile" to make someone's day by providing the unexpected "more."

Today when I asked the question, my guests were delighted... not that they had anything particular in mind, but that I was willing to do whatever I was able to make their stay a pleasant one. Just knowing that I wanted to do something good for them made a difference.

As I was cleaning up afterwards, I reflected on the experience and thought about the fact that God asks us that question all the time. "What more can I do for you, my child? Is there something extra, something special that I can do just for you today?"

God knows our hearts and our minds. He knows the things that we long to have, the places we long to go, the dreams we dare to dream... and He wants to help bring the good things to us. Everyday, He provides for us in ways that we don't see; He provides our "daily bread."

And yet, He longs to do so much more! He wants to give us the desires of our hearts (Psalm 37:4). So, think about what it is that you want? The thing that goes beyond daily need and gets to the heart of what will bring you delight. God, the Father, is waiting to give you that little something extra that is special just for you. Ask!

Oh, and while you're waiting for Him to give you the desires of your heart... take time to thank Him for caring enough to ask "What more can I do for you my child?"

Two are better than one...

Today is one of those days for me... One of the days when I hate being alone. It's a day that this passage from Ecclesiastes 4 comes to mind:  

⁹ Two are better than one,
   because they have a good return for their work:
¹⁰ If one falls down,
   his friend can help him up.
But pity the man who falls
   and has no one to help him up!
¹¹ Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
   But how can one keep warm alone?
¹² Though one may be overpowered,
   two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

I have so many things I want to accomplish, so many dreams I want to pursue... and, yet, I find myself never getting around to doing anything.

I think it has a lot to do with the way God designed me, perhaps the way He designed us all. After all, He's the one who said "It is not good for man to be alone." (Gen 2:18) I do not believe God ever intended for individuals to live their lives alone and with out a "helper". [NOTE: Having said that, I also do not believe that everyone is "destined" to marry. I'll discuss that in another blog, but that's not what I want to talk about here.] 

Solomon, in all his wisdom, notes that "they have good return for their work." I get that. I'm the kind of person who needs to have someone to come along side me and help me to reason through the ideas that I have. Nothing motivates me more than to have someone else be excited about the things that are exciting to me. It's not so much that I need someone to DO the work with me; I need someone with whom I can talk out loud about the work that needs to be done. When I speak, I need to know that someone hears.

Today I feel lost and overwhelmed because I have a mind full of truly good ideas and I don't know where to start. I look around me and see dozens of things that need to be done now and can't find the place to begin. Today is a day that I feel like I've fallen and there's no one to help me up. 

Wise counsel has suggested that when I feel lonely, I should think of Jesus being in the room with me and talk to Him. I like that idea; I get the concept. And yet, the fact is, sometimes I need to audibly hear Him talking with me. I need to hear Him saying, "Yes, that's a good idea... and what about this? Did you think of how this would impact that?" And sometimes, I need Jesus to get the other end of the table, help me to move it and then to say, "Yes, I think this is the perfect set up for tomorrow's activity!" 

God never intended for us to do everything alone and certainly He is always with us in spirit. (He's promised never to leave or forsake us ~ Deuteronomy 31:6) However, Jesus also wants to be present to us physically and, for now, He can only do this through His Children. One day we will see Him face-to-face. In the meantime, I sure do wish / hope / pray that He would show me who it is that can "come along side" and help me in the journey I am traveling.

A table in the presence of our enemies

On Monday I traveled to Bowling Green to surprise my mama for her birthday. When I arrived, I encouraged her to invite a few friends over for dinner. Later that day we gathered together and it was the most wonderful time of fellowship! We talked and laughed and told stories. Occasionally, a brief sorrow would bring a tear welling up in someone's eye, but mostly we laughed! 

The guests at our table represented many of the sorrows that we all face in this broken world: recent loss of a loved one, a battle with cancer, the reminder of getting older, hearts broken both physically and emotionally, relationships that need mending. We represented broken hearts and broken bodies. Our enemy, the devil, loves it when we are broken. He wants to keep us that way. 

And yet, at that table there was great joy! I can only find one explanation: Jesus. Each one at that table has hope because of Jesus. As I was thinking about this experience, I saw a picture of what the psalmist meant when he wrote Psalm 23:5, " You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows." The enemy wanted us to feast on brokenness and drink tears, but Jesus was also present at our table. He was our host and sent the enemy fleeing. Certainly, there were moments that we shared sorrows together, but they were fleeting moments as our laughter filled the room. 

May you find the peace and joy that is available, even in the midst of great sorrow!

"Inconvenient" sacrifice

This morning I did some work for the church I attend. It's something I volunteered for a number of months ago and have been doing, typically once a month, ever since.

Now when I signed up for this work, I actually thought I was signing up for something else altogether. Has that ever happened to you? From the very first time that I did the work until today, I have had a complaining spirit! It's not the the work is too hard, but more that it feels inconvenient to me. Always I can think of 100 other things I'd rather be doing.

Here's a little of what my internal conversation looked like this morning.

 "I wish I'd known what I was signing up for, I never would have done so. It takes forever [not usually more than two hours] and I always [once a month] have to do it by myself." 

 "You're right, Julie, but volunteering is good for you. It is a way to give back to the church and it fits you schedule."

"I know, but it's so inconvenient! I wish I could find an easier way to 'sacrifice' for the church."

"Oh, yes. Perhaps something less demanding... like say,... dying on the cross for the sins of all people across eternity."

Ouch. Ok, I deserved that. Guess my 'sacrifice' isn't so inconvenient after all. 

$1.34 worth of anger, so not worth the cost...

A few days ago, I went to Goodwill to pick up a few things. After making my selections, I headed up to the check out. There were 4 people in front of me and one person was working. The cashier paged the manager and asked for help, but was told that they were "in a meeting." Um, OK. Perhaps it's the retail manager in me talking (and I do realize this is Goodwill, not Target) but, in my opinion, someone should have come to help. By this time there were now 4 more people behind me, so this one cashier was trying to assist 9 people with no one else on the floor to do anything to assist her.

After finishing with the first person, the cashier runs into a problem with the second. She calls again for help. By now I am getting angry... not at the cashier but at the lack of concern that the management seems to have for either customer or employee. (They had not even looked out to see what the circumstance might be in regards to business in the store.) As she calls for help, I say "If they don't come now to help, I'll get on there and talk to them." (meaning the pager system.) When the manager replies back with "what do you need" I yell in a loud voice, "She needs you to get up here and help her!"

The manager strolls to the front to begin to help. Apparently the customer didn't have enough money on the card she used and needed to pay another way. They would need to reverse the entire transaction and start over. Really? At this point I threw my items in an empty basket sitting nearby, said, "I don't need any of this that bad!" and walked out.

The very next day, I read this in my Bible:

"Take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you" ~ James 1:19-21

"anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." Wow. Talk about a well deserved slap in the face! There was absolutely NOTHING accomplished through my anger. It didn't help the cashier to get the help she deserved. It didn't treat the other customers with any respect. It didn't honor God in any way whatsoever.

To top it all off: The James Bible Study I am participating in had this challenge for the week: Find an opportunity to be a blessing to someone else... As I reflected back on this event, I was made aware of what I didn't listen to (be quick to listen) when the problem arose at Goodwill... the customer was short $1.34! How easy it would have been for me to pay the difference for her and let her go on her way. Instead, I let me anger get the best of me...

I'd like to say this was the first time I'd walked out of a situation in anger, but unfortunately, it is not. I'm confessing today that I have an anger issue... and I have a problem with "walking out" when I should stay and be part of the solution. It is my prayer that with God's help, I will develop a life of humility and overcome the anger that holds me captive. The fact is, walking away has cost me a lot and I no longer want to pay.

"But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it—he will be blessed in what he does." ~James 1:25

A sure foundation

"There comes a time to drive a stake in the ground and lay claim to one life, one focused goal, and one God." ~ Beth Moore in James, Mercy Triumphs

Those who know me, know that I'm a wanderer... I don't often stay put for very long and have moved numerous times in the last 30 years. In fact, it got to where my nomadic tendencies became ingrained into my very being. It was a point of identity for me.

Today, I'm reading and reflecting on these words from James:

"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously and without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks he should not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does." ~James 1:5-8

While there are many things I have taken from this study today, there is one point that I feel I need to focus on and be thankful to the Lord for helping me to deal with in my own life. Over the past three or four years, I believe God has been dealing with my nomadic tendencies and helping me to better see how my constant moves have not only been unhealthy for me, but have also been evidence of my lack of faith in Him to meet my needs. I have wandered from one place to another and one opportunity to another, constantly hoping to find the "next best thing" for my life. In doing so I have removed any stability that I may have hoped to have in my life.

In all my wanderings I never stopped long enough to genuinely ask: "Julie, what are you looking for? What is is that you think you need?" and I certainly didn't intentionally ask God to provide wisdom for the decisions I was making. Isaiah 33:6 says, "He [God] will be the sure foundation for your times, a rich store of salvation and wisdom and knowledge; the fear of the Lord is the key to His treasures."

Oh, how I need a sure foundation! I look back and see how weary my wavering has made me... and then I stop and thank God for the stability that He is bringing to my life. Certainly, it is still a work in process because I am not always a good student for the lessons He is teaching me. And yet, I find JOY in seeing how He is taking all the ways that He has created me and is molding them into a life that I truly love and that allows me to be of service to Him.

Looking back at James' words, there is one phrase that really speaks to my heart: "without finding fault." I hope that speaks to you, too. Just think, when we have been floundering about, trying to make decisions on our own and moving willy-nilly through life... and when we finally get around to asking God for wisdom... He doesn't throw our past failures in our face. Instead He generously gives us the wisdom we desire. Praise God for His loving kindness that meets our every need!

Pound Puppies

Have you ever adopted a pet from an animal shelter? My brother, Joe, has a Rottweiler named Boxcar that he rescued from the shelter. (He was quite literally on the cusp of being euthanized.) After spending time in a cage at the shelter, Boxcar loved the wide open spaces. He got to Joe's house and never looked back!  In fact, while he readily got into the car for the ride home from the shelter, it was a very long time before Joe could convince him to get into a vehicle again. It was like he said, "Hey, I've found my way home and I'm not ever going away again... especially if it means going back to where I've come from!" Do you think that Boxcar still focuses on where he came from, or that he lives each day happy for where he is? He may have thought about and worried about where he had been for a long time, afraid he'd have to go back there. Eventually, he surely decided to just enjoy where he had arrived. He had come home!

What about you? Do you look back on life and think: "Man, I was really living in the pound!" Perhaps that's not true in the sense of a physical place, but maybe it is true of the place you found yourself spiritually and emotionally. Your life wasn't exactly what you'd hope it would turn out to be. You found yourself "caged in" ...held captive to your sin. Then, one day, you were set free. Jesus came and rescued you from the pound. He brought you out into a spacious place. So my question to you is this: Are you focusing on the place you have been rescued from? Or are you enjoying the place you have you have been brought home to? Are you looking back at the ones who held you captive, or are you looking forward towards the one who set you free? As Beth Moore has said: "Without Jesus in our lives, we identify with what we have been delivered from rather than who we have been deliver to." Are you living a life of freedom, or fear?

 ¹⁶ He reached down from on high and took hold of me;
   he drew me out of deep waters.
¹⁷ He rescued me from my powerful enemy,
   from my foes, who were too strong for me.
¹⁸ They confronted me in the day of my disaster,
   but the LORD was my support.
¹⁹ He brought me out into a spacious place;
   he rescued me because he delighted in me.

                                                                   ~Psalm 19

Who's getting your leftovers?

For those who don't know, I'm an innkeeper for a bed and breakfast. I love my job because I love to cook! One of the dishes I often prepare is a baked oatmeal dish that happens to be a house favorite. I got the recipe from one of my guests, who said she got it from an inn located in Pennsylvania. According to my guest, this inn would make a big batch and then reheat it as needed for guests. I'll say that I've had it reheated and it really is quite tasty the second time around... still, I can't bring myself to serve leftovers to my guests.

It just seems to me that my guests deserve my best and, while the baked oatmeal is perfectly fine reheated, it isn't fresh... it isn't my best. And so, I save the leftovers for myself and cook up a fresh batch. I do this even if I just made it the day before and I have a new guest who wouldn't suspect it was left over. I would know that it is leftover and that isn't good enough. 

Recently, I read a devotional that challenged me to consider: Am I feeding Jesus my leftovers? And more importantly, am I feeding Jesus my leftovers while I feast on the best morsels myself? I have looked back and evaluated my time and how I've spent it. There are many days when I have plenty of time to "do as I please" because there isn't anything scheduled in my day. (I don't mean that I have nothing that needs to be done, just that there isn't a specific time schedule for completing the task, or a specific place to be at a specific time.) So often I find myself playing on the computer or watching TV... things that are not bad, but things that are not (or at least shouldn't be) big priorities in my life. I realize on some days that I've not bothered to spend even a few minutes in prayer, or studying my Bible, or doing anything that would give me the opportunity to spend time with Jesus, whom I claim to love.

It has been said that if you want to get to know someone better you should spend time with them. Not just a moment here or there, but quality time that allows for communication and growth of the relationship. If I really want to be like Jesus in the way I live my day to day life, I have to spend time with Him... and not just the time that is "left over" after I've done everything I want/need to do. He wants my first fruits. He deserves my first fruits!

Lord, forgive me for giving you what is left of my day. Sadly some days that means you get nothing. I want to place you first in my life, not last. Help me to find self-discipline in this area so that I can know you and love you more fully.

Fools rush in...

So, I'm still thinking about the words "speaking the truth in love" and about the importance of having brothers and sisters in Christ who are willing to do just that. 

Today I was chatting with a friend and during our conversation, I recalled this quote from me: "The only thing worse than making a fool of yourself is having your friends sit back and watch you do it." I can still recall the situation that birthed these words from my mouth.

I've decided to change the specific details (to protect the innocent, of course), but here's the scenario. I met a guy we'll call Mike and thought we might have potential to be more than just friends. However, due to my "incredible" (NOT) track record in this area of my life, I didn't trust myself to be a good judge of the situation. I asked a few of my friends, who knew Mike better than I did, to tell me if there were any "red flags" that I should be aware of... and they said nothing. Several months later, AFTER Mike and I had ceased to be friends, one of Mike's relatives asked me, "So, do you think Mike is involved with drugs?" (not the real question, just protecting the innocent again). I asked my friends, who I had requested honest feedback from, if they thought that drugs were an issue with Mike. They said, "Well, we weren't sure... we had sort of heard that, but we could be certain... so we thought we'd just keep our mouths shut." WOW. OK, thanks. Glad you've got my back. 

I do understand that they didn't want to spread gossip, but that's not what I'm talking about here. It is different to spread a tale (whether true or false) if the only motive is to get a gasp of shock and an opportunity to talk negatively about someone, so that we can feel better about ourselves. It is another thing all together to make someone aware of a situation they may want to  approach with caution. 

Don't be silent. You never know how your words will be used to bring wisdom and understanding to a situation. You never know how your words may help a friend to avoid a life time of pain and sorrow. Your words have the power to heal, to bring reconciliation, to correct errors... to LOVE. 

Speaking the TRUTH in LOVE

I wonder how often we stop to think about the power of our words? We have the power in our tongues to build up or tear down, heal or hurt. The tiniest of words can cause the greatest of pain or the greatest of joy. It is all a matter of how we choose. Here are a few examples that I've seen play out via the wonders of facebook: 

 

Example one: a friend has been hurt by those she thought were her friends. They have lashed at her and hurt her deeply. She has a choice to make: Does she fight back with her own hurtful words? Should she ignore their words? 

 

Example two: a friend observes behavior that seems inappropriate or that has in someway offended. Does she overlook the offense? Should she speak up and let the offender know how she feels? 

 

 Example three: A person reads something that is full of grammatical and spelling errors (perhaps this very blog). Does he proceed to publicly comment on the "lack of education" and "ignorance" of the individual? Should he point the errors out privately? Would it be better to overlook the errors and focus on the message instead? 

 

In each of these instances there are more things that need to be considered. On the one hand, what might be the consequences of speaking up? How will my words be received? What will the other person or people think of me because I choose to speak up? Will I make enemies or friends by what I say? On the other hand, what are the consequences for remaining silent? Will I have missed an opportunity to be a healing balm or a corrective voice to another? Will a wrong be perpetuated because I choose to overlook it? 

Do we consider the consequences of the choices we make? I like this advice: Before [you] say something to or about someone else, [you] should ask [yourself]: “Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?” Good advice! It reminds me of the Apostle Paul's admonishment that we should "speak the truth in love."(Ephesians 4:15)

The five little words "speak the truth in love" carry a tall order. What must we do in order to fulfill this Word from the Lord? How do we know what the truth is? 

There are several places in scripture where we are told to speak truth. Here are a few: 

"These are the things you are to do: Speak the truth to each other, and render true and sound judgment in your courts; do not plot evil against your neighbor, and do not love to swear falsely. I hate all this,” declares the LORD." ~Zechariah 8:26-17

•  ¹ LORD, who may dwell in your sanctuary?
     Who may live on your holy hill?
   ² He whose walk is blameless
     and who does what is righteous,
  who speaks the truth from his heart
   ³ and has no slander on his tongue,
  who does his neighbor no wrong
     and casts no slur on his fellowman,
  ⁴ who despises a vile man
     but honors those who fear the LORD,
  who keeps his oath
     even when it hurts,
  ⁵ who lends his money without usury
     and does not accept a bribe against the innocent.
     He who does these things
     will never be shaken.  ~Psalm 15
  

So we see that God wants us to speak truth. However, we are not to do so harshly and without caring for the person to whom we are speaking. We also find scripture that ties together truth with love, gentleness and humility: 

 "Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth." ~1 Corinthians 13:6

Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for each other, love one another deeply, from the heart. ~ 1 Peter 1:21

My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.   ~1 John 3:18

Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself. ~Galatians 6:1

But avoid foolish and ignorant disputes, knowing that they generate strife. And a servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all, able to teach, patient, in humility correcting those who are in opposition, if God perhaps will grant them repentance, so that they may know the truth, and that they may come to their senses and escape the snare of the devil, having been taken captive by him to do his will. ~ 2 Timothy 2:23-26

So, first, we ask our self: "Is what I want to say TRUE?" It takes a great deal of prayer, requesting that the Holy Spirit reveal the truth of the matter. We can easily get caught up in our own prejudices and develop a clouded view of the situation. We must learn to look through Jesus' eyes an not our own. 

 

Once we have arrived at the truth, we must then ask if it is necessary to speak up. Will speaking up make things better?  If so, better for who and in what way? It is not enough to speak the truth. If our motivation is to "be right" in an argument or to seem "smarter" then we are not likely to be speaking the truth in love.  Is someone in danger? Is harm being done? So we must first consider out motivation. Why do we feel it is necessary to speak up?

Now that we've decided to speak up, we must ask if the words we have chosen are "kind." Remember, our words have the opportunity to hurt or heal. Even when another person is wrong or has wronged someone, they are still people of value in Jesus' eyes. (He died for them, too... even if they aren't yet ready to accept that truth.) We must approach with a sincere heart, prepared to lovingly correct the situation. 

 

Obviously, our words (no matter how well intended) won't always be received well. If we have sincerely attempted to obediently follow the Spirit's leading in how we approach the situation, we must then release the results of our obedience into His hands. We cannot force another to accept the word we attempt to deliver. In the end, we are to "obey God and not man" (Acts 5:29).

Well, this blog has ended up much longer than I expected and I'm not sure I've made sense... normally, I would go back and read it again, but it's late and I'm tired. So, having attempted to speak the truth in love, I'll just leave it in God's hands, praying that you "may grow up in all things into Him who is the head— that is, Christ— from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love." ~Ephesians 4:15-16

Choose Christ and His Ways.

 Today in church we held The John Wesley Covenant Renewal Service. This service is an opportunity to make a new commitment to "choose Christ and His ways." There are so many challenges found within this covenant and I love that WFMC revisits the covenant each year as a way to begin the clean slate that is placed before us on January 1. I try to find at least one gem to carry with me through the year ahead. The thing that the Lord speaks most strongly to me during this season of my life. So, this blog is about what I believe is my challenge for 2012. 

 Here are the paragraphs that I'm keeping before me today: 

"And because You require, as the condition of our peace with You, that we should put away idols, we here and now from the bottom of our hears renounce them all. We firmly covenant with You not to allow ourselves to continue in any known sin. We will, instead, conscientiously use all means that we know You have prescribed for the death and utter destruction of everything that corrupts us."

 We humbly affirm before Your glorious Majesty that it is the firm resolution of our hearts to forsake all that is dear to us in this world, rather than to turn from You to the ways of sin. We will guard ourselves against all temptations, whether from prosperity or poverty, pleasure or pain, so that they may never draw our hearts away from You."

 Those are a couple loaded paragraphs and there is so much that challenges me. These words contain a tall order to fill; I have so many places in my life that need to be addressed. It would be easy to become overwhelmed! So, I want to start out simple. NOTE: This is not about making a "New Years Resolution"... those seem to be made to be broken. This is about Choosing Christ and His Ways.

1. I will spend regular time in intentional prayer, including time praying God's Word and listening for HIS guidance. I will set aside at least 1 hour each day to spend in these activities. 
2. I will make choices in my day to day living that recognize that my body is God's temple. I will honor His temple by treating it with the respect it deserves. This includes, but is not limited to: eating healthy foods in appropriate portions, being physically and mentally active so that I will honor God with my body and my mind. 
3. I will intentionally seek opportunities to be His hands, feet and voice. I will not take the credit for acts of service, but will humbly remember that I can do all things through Him and I am nothing without Him. 

I am giving you, the reader of this blog, permission to do the following: 

1. Ask me to pray for you. Ask me if I have remembered to pray for you. Ask me what the Lord has spoken to me today. If I can't give an answer, don't let it go. Speak the truth in Love and help me to be a better person. 
2. If you see me making unhealthy choices about my physical or mental well being, please challenge me! Call me on it. Again, speak the truth in love.. It's so true that sometimes the truth hurts, but don't let fear of hurting me keep you from doing what is right for me. You see, so often when we see our brother or sister in sin, we don't want to say anything for fear that we might offend. However, in the long run, if we let our brother or sister continue in sin we are doing a far greater damage than if we had taken a moment to give honest and loving correction.
3. If you know about opportunities where I can be of service, please invite me in! AND if you catch me in a prideful moment, please let me know. I most often catch myself in the "hidden" pride that says "do it yourself." I often neglect to let others come along side in the work that I'm doing. Failing to allow others to be involved in the work I'm lead to accomplish denies others of their own God appointed opportunities to serve. If it seems that the task before me becomes more about my accomplishment than God's ministry speak up! I NEED to know (even when I think I don't WANT to know.

This request to God is written in the covenant, and I ask you to be God's voice to me in answering this prayer: 

"I humbly beg You that if You see any flaw or falsehood in my resolve, reveal it to me and help me put it right."

May 2012 hold all God's biggest and best blessings for you. May you find Joy around every corner and find peace in your heart and in your home. May you be His humble servant all the days of your life, that those who do not yet know Him might meet Him through you and Choose Christ and His Ways for life.